Hank: Miguel? You there?
Miguel: hey man
Hank: What did you think of the group meeting? Going to come back to the next one?
Miguel: maybe
Hank: Only maybe? Why?
Miguel: well... i'm a bit afraid of possible consequences
Miguel: i really spilled it, you know
Hank: Dude, you were nothing compared to what some people spilled!
Miguel: oh yeah?
Hank: One guy's got this thing for dogs now!
Hank: In a perverted way
Miguel: oh geez. like all dogs? or just cute ones?
Miguel: j/k
Hank: I don't think he cares.
Miguel: why would anyone share something like that?
Hank: And one guy told about how he and his fiance ripped apart a couple of mean deputies.
Miguel: dude!!!
Miguel: copkillers!
Hank: People like us have to let this stuff out!
Hank: Nah, the cops were being total dicks.
Miguel: maybe it would be better to keep it all in
Miguel: ah, thats normal
Miguel: for cops
Hank: And let it fester and and then you get even worse. It's a psycological fact!
Miguel: well... i dont know about that. but there is one reason to go back, i guess. maybe
Hank: You've got to have what the shrinks call an outlet or you'll go crazy!
Miguel: okay
Hank: Oh ho! And who is the one reason to go back?
Miguel: not you, of course
Hank: Better not be!
Miguel: but... that lady
Miguel: lucy?
Hank: Lucrezia?
Miguel: a longer name... starts w - yes! that's it
Miguel: kind of scary
Hank: Yeah, she's hot, isn't she?
Miguel: hot and scary, had nice clogs on, i notiecd
Hank: You got a thing about feet?
Miguel: no
Hank: Uh huh.
Miguel: i said no... just drop it
Hank: Ok. Dropping it. Geez!
Miguel: so... change subject... why do you care if i go back?
Miguel: really worried about my mental helth?
Hank: Sure.
Miguel: right
Hank: It looks bad for all of us if one of us goes crazy.
Miguel: you probably want to corner me and talk about spyware problems your having
Hank: Nope. You had me setup that scanner thing and it's doing okay.
Miguel: hard to mess up.
Hank: This is more about bullies and stuff. Like what you ran into as a kid. I had trouble with bullies, too.
Miguel: so... you dont want a rough alpo, then?
Miguel: *rogue
Miguel: okay
Hank: Dude, I TOLD you to STOP with the alpo bit!
Miguel: sorry lol
Hank: So anyway, I first found out I had ALPS when this kid was bullying me back in seventh grade.
Miguel: that sucks
Hank: His name was Larry and he had his own little gang.
Hank: Yeah, it did.
Miguel: tough guys always have their "little gangs"
Miguel: not so tough alone
Hank: Larry and his gang were trying to beat the crap out of me when I transformed for the first time.
Hank: I wouldn't know about that.
Miguel: and whipped them???
Hank: Worse, I bit them but didn't kill them.
Miguel: so you gave them alps?
Hank: Yeah. And Larry was the alpha.
Miguel: serves them right
Miguel: what did he get then?
Miguel: badger?
Hank: They were all werewolves like me.
Hank: But since Larry was alpha, I had to join his stupid pack.
Miguel: oh! thats right - my bad
Miguel: werewolf strain
Miguel: no you didn't!
Hank: And he made my life a living Hell until I got away by going across the country to college.
Miguel: lone wolf hank
Hank: Not as easy as you think, dude. Particularly when you've got seven or eight other wolves forcing you into the pack.
Miguel: you must have it bad. sometimes i hear the calls... but i can usually lock myself inside
Miguel: dont tell anyone
Hank: Larry's the guy I'd like to shoot with a dart gun filled with ALPS cure.
Miguel: then what... tear open his ribcage???
Hank: Oh yeah.
Miguel: geez
Hank: Or maybe just scare the crap out of him once he sees I'm in charge?
Miguel: thats better
Miguel: killing on acident is one thing. purpose is another
Hank: But the cure isn't out there yet so I've got another plan.
Miguel: go for it
Hank: Larry still runs his little gang down in South Carolina. That's where I grew up.
Miguel: okay
Hank: I figure I just need to show up with my own gang. A gang of good weres to take on Larry and his pack.
Miguel: like a micheal jackson video!
Hank: Probalby not.
Miguel: arooooooo!
Hank: I can't dance worth a darn.
Miguel: oh
Miguel: me either
Hank: Problem is I can't get anyone else in the group to join my gang of good guys.
Miguel: there probably thinking the same thing as me
Miguel: bad idea
Miguel: not worth it
Hank: I was hoping you'd join and others would follow.
Hank: What's wrong with the idea?
Miguel: why would i want to join?
Miguel: what about getting arrested???
Hank: Nah. Nobody likes Larry back at home. The cops would be glad he got his butt whupped.
Hank: Trust me.
Miguel: okay. but who would want to help? i dont have a gruge!
Hank: We're a support group! Don't you think you should support me in my hour of need?
Hank: I'd do the same for you!
Hank: Really.
Hank: I would.
Miguel: i appreciate it... but
Hank: But?
Miguel: not much for fighting
Hank: Ah, man. I'm never going to get my gang...
Miguel: well..
Hank: Yeah?
Miguel: promise me you wont go alone
Miguel: sounds dangerous
Hank: I never go home for that reason. My family comes up here to visit me, instead.
Miguel: thats just sad
Hank: I had to sneak out of town just to go to college.
Hank: So you won't join me gang of good weres?
Miguel: what if you beat him? will the others follow?
Hank: Sure. If you beat the alpha you become the alpha.
Miguel: you just need to beat him then
Miguel: alone
Hank: I don't know... I never could before and I bet he's still as mean and strong and stupid as ever!
Miguel: you need a delilah
Hank: A what?
Miguel: delilah. chick in the good book
Miguel: tricked samson
Miguel: made him weak and the enemies got him
Hank: I don't know what a chick could cut off of him that would let me kick his butt, though.
Miguel: i just think you need a trap, not a gang
Miguel: why am i helping you!!!
Hank: Cause you're my friend?
Miguel: your just sad
Hank: A trap. Hm...
Miguel: yes, im your friend
Miguel: ha ha ha hA HA HAHA!
Hank: I got to think on the trap idea for a while.
Miguel: i got it for you
Miguel: hence that laughter
Hank: Yeah?
Miguel: im delilah
Miguel: hee hee hee
Hank: You're not a cross dresser are you?
Miguel: no
Miguel: but on the net you can be anything
Hank: Oh!
Miguel: get my idea?
Hank: Yeah! Assuming Larry's smart enough to even use a computer.
Miguel: probably... not everyone has your problems.
Miguel: j/k
Hank: So you'll set up a rendezvous with him to lure him away from his pack then I kick his butt from an ambush?
Miguel: it could work
Miguel: i dont know if i want to be involved but it is a very fun idea
Hank: Yeah, it just might.
Miguel: listen... if you offer me something really good, ill help you
Hank: Glad you didn't suggest using Lucrezia as the Delilah cause she'd probably rip open both our rib cages!
Miguel: im low on work.
Miguel: ha ha ha ha ha
Miguel: i dont want her falling for anyone
Hank: What kind of work do you usually do?
Miguel: other than computers... sometimes fix other sutff
Hank: She wouldn't fall for Larry. She's got to have better taste than that!
Hank: Cars?
Miguel: girls like bad guys
Miguel: sure
Miguel: cars are easy
Hank: Yeah, but girls don't like morons.
Hank: At least smart girls don't.
Miguel: not good at chips and stuff, but classics are a breeze
Miguel: sometimes they dont realize until its too late
Hank: OK, let me check with my boss at the used car lot tomorrow. He's always moaning and groaning about the cost of fixing up some of the cars we get.
Miguel: okay
Miguel: get me a regular job and ill set the bait
Miguel: but i dont want to fight
Miguel: seriously
Hank: Deal.
Miguel: deal
Hank: I'll call you tomorrow once I talk to the boss.
Miguel: sounds fine. think lucrazia will be at the next meeting?
Hank: She never misses.
Miguel: cool. better go... ill see you then
Hank: OK. Cya
Miguel: later
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[A lithe figure, wearing a khaki trenchcoat and a brown fedora that casts his facial features into shadow, glides silently into the room and slips into the seat closest to the door.]
Hey, Miguel? You know that guy back there in the trench coat and hat? I don't like having someone sitting in on a meeting without someone knowing who they are. There's no telling who they might be! Plus, that kind of thing makes people jumpy and we definitely don't want a room full of jumpy weres!
Since when are the "Shoe Police" allowed in to an ALPS meeting?
Miguel, you really need to pay attention to what's going in your head and not my legs and shoes!
News brief: I am in a purrfect relationship now boys. I'm alps, he's not. But he understands.
And to both of you, Hank, this includes you. Leave me out of your
half a$$ed crazy plans.
Hiss off before a change comes over me.
[The figure speaks]
You're quite brash, aren't you? Even for one who announces to the world that he's looking to violate RICO...
uh, sorry... didn't mean for you to hear all that, lucrezia...
...and who are you talking to, shadowy guy?
honestly, dude. who do you think you are... dick tracy?
[to Miguel]
Chat rooms aren't as secure as you think they are, amigo.
I, too, was tapped into your little conversation.
You're both under arrest.
Carp, I warned the group that we need to sweep for bugs every meeting now that the Obama has been elected. Rumor mill has it that we are on his hit list of non-desirables. Damn, that were- undercover agent should have done in Ayers when he had the chance instead of biting him/infecting him. Instead of becoming an animal, he became something unimaginable. Yes, Ayers became a liberal arts professor.
Ah, relax. It was just a joke. Put your hackles back down.
Hiss, snarl, hiss snarl. Anonymouse,
you really should be careful in a group such as this. You could end up being a tasty snack for something much larger and nastier than your attempted humor.
yeah, lucrezia! you tell him!
i was ready to bite your head off, dude. but this girl is tougher than nails. she's like a, uh, were-ninja!
Miguel,
That is so sweet. Actually more like an ill tempered were-bobcat. I do apologize to the group for my short temper this evening. The fall rut is going on, there are so many smells in the air. It's so intoxicating and yet, so irritating at the same time. It's like major PMS with an attitude.
Hey, pardon me, folks, if I'm busting in here... but whose absolutely gorgeous seeing-eye dog is that out in the lobby? Did you see her? She's perfect!
Just curious...
no problem, lucrezia. and i'm, uh, glad that your in a good relationship with someone that understands you.
ive been feeling a little weird lately too. didn't think about the fall thing. im not as up on my alps as you all are... n00b, i guess.
Call me....Jack.
And this group stands about as much chance of snacking on me as Hillary does of becoming Secretary of State.
But you were right about sweeping for bugs. You might have found mine...
[walks over to the slide projector from last week and removes something from underneath it]
Jack, are you anonymouse? Just a little bitty creature, afraid of his own shadow.
Jim, I'm not sure who the seeing eye dog is. We do have some members with split personalities, if you get my drift. Go introduce your self.
I... can't just go up and talk to a strange lady, er, dog, like that.
Maybe I'd better just go home to my wife...
Jack, I must say, your behavior is inexcusable.
I'm doing my best to moderate here. Folks with ALPS have enough problems without strangers acting as spies on their meetings.
I suggest that if you're dealing with ALPS yourself, you might want to sit down, mingle with folks, and act like a civilized were. We're glad to have you... but this Private Dick stuff needs to be canned.
Go grab some coffee or something!
Mouse? No, I'm afraid not. Just someone who prefers a certain level of...anonymity.
I wear this coat and hat, passé though they may be, because they help preserve that.
Plus, it's friggin' cold up here this time of year.
I understand the consternation which my appearance has caused, sir, and I apologize.
But the manner in which some of your members have been conducting themselves could have imperiled all of you.
Or did you not hear what Dr. Stewart was saying last week? About people that hunt us...er, you?
so, jack... you're one too, aren't you? you really think someone's coming after us?
No, Miguel, not yet. I hacked the chat server which you and Hank were using to see who else was connected, and only myself and the lady showed up. They could still have been monitoring the packets, but I left a FOTW running, and nobody else has come snooping around yet.
But you should be more judicious in your chatroom usage. I was serious about the possibility of a RICO violation and the government could take an interest in that. But they're not the ones I'm concerned about.
At the least, use some personal encryption software.
ah... I should've thought of that. hank and i were chatting over the wireless here. thanks for the info. i didn't know it was a big deal. now im wishing i stayed out of this whole "support group" deal.
The support group is fine. I have been monitoring it for some time, and it's clean from the outside.
A "gang", however, would attract interest. Such things are best done below the radar, if you know what I mean.
Yeah, Miguel clued me in on the problems with the whole gang thing. But he's got a really good way to help get a one on one shot at the guy who used to bully me, so there's nothing to worry about.
Lucrezia, you know there's no way I'd try to draw you into my plans. You already made your position on that real clear! Heck, I'm the one who said you'd probably rip open our rib cages if we even thought about involving you!
Jack, you're coming off as some super mysterious junior ALPS g-man or something. Care to tell us a bit more about yourself?
Jim, as for the seeing eye dog, I can tell you for certain that were-German Shepherds do exist. Not saying she's one, but she could be!
No problem Hank, I'm just a little testy with the fall rut thing. I seem to be hypersensitive to the estrus cycle of large animals, especially white tail deer. I battle this over whelming urge to change and hang in the forest to chase the does and bucks. But...that can be very dangerous for a were's health. Last time I gave into my urge a freaking hunter took a shot at me.
Now, I ask you, do bobcats look anything like a white tailed deer. NO, but some of these freaking hunters will shoot at anything brownish that moves.
Hence, pent up hunger, excitement, energy, etc. I do apologize if I came of as some what bitchy.
Understood, Lucrezia. And it's not like you lady weres get any support. I mean, when a guy transforms and hunts, he's just being a beast. Like, you know, all men are supposed to be. You women are supposed to all nurturing and above all that blood lust and stuff. That's got to be tough even on the best of days.
okay hank... leave the lady alone before you get hurt. your laying it on a leeeeetle thick.
I have news for you, women are not above the blood lust. We hunt just as well as men. Actually quite often, in the animal world, it is the female that does the hunting.
It is often said that the worst place in the world to be is between a mama bear and her cub.
Actually, the worst place to be is between a PMSing were-mama and her family.
I didn't say it right, Lucrezia. I understand you've got the same blood lusts as men but there's a whole political agenda out there to claim female weres are peaceful and, I don't know, vegetarians or something. I think that crap comes from universities. You know, where people who don't have any experience with the thing they're writing about write "scholarly" papers filled with pronouncements and pontifications? That's what I was talking about.
Sorry, Hank, but I'm a bit of a lone wolf and paranoid at that. I just stopped by with a little theatrical warning to show you how easy it would be for someone to come in and take you all out.
Remember this story?
It could become real.
See ya later.
So some of y'all mentioned over at the Ranting Room that you'd like a theme song. I'm happy to do music, but I didn't get the lyrics gene. Anyone interested?
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