(The following editorial appeared in the Sunday, December 7th edition of the Miami Herald.)
by Michael Zevon
Imprisoning civilians? Mass quarantines? Targeting minorities?
It sounds like a nightmare straight from the dark days of Stalin’s purges - but if a certain uninformed and overwrought segment of our nation gets their way, these atrocities could soon be taking place right here in America. Who knows – someone in your family might be targeted!
Now, what would bring this attack on a sub-set of America? Who do you think these new “criminals” would be? Illegal immigrants? Terror suspects?
Far from it! Rather, some elitists are focusing their fear and hatred on the sufferers of a rare and hard-to-spread disease – Acquired Lycanthropic Polymorphism Syndrome (ALPS).
Yes, we’ve heard the stories. That people living with ALPS turn “violent” or somehow transform into “werewolves” or “killing machines.” Granted, there have been some minor incidents. But that needn’t mean that ALPS victims need to be treated with contempt! Quite the opposite. The men and women that struggle with this disease, and indeed any other disease, need an extra dose of care! How about showing some compassion? Maybe even a little love? A little education and awareness go a long way. In this age of supposed tolerance, shouldn’t we be over the prejudices of the past?
Apparently some aren’t. For example, consider this quote from the editors of the Chicago Tribune: “Until a cure is found, we call on President-Elect Obama to order the internment of all those who suffer from ALPS.” (Nov. 30th, 2008)
Unbelievable! Interment? This is not WWII! We’re talking about our fellow Americans. Our neighbors. Our friends. Not our enemies.
No wonder ALPS sufferers are reluctant to share their struggles! Would you if you were afraid of discrimination… or even of being put behind bars… just because you have some occasional hard-to-control symptoms? Certainly not!
It’s time to stop the madness. Ask yourself – is this or is this not a free country? Those in power have already damaged their credibility through anti-freedom legislation such as the Patriot Act. It’s time to stop finding new targets and start returning to the freedoms on which this nation was founded.
Or one day we may all wake up in chains.
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11 comments:
Mebbe they think if they put us all in cages, we'll just go to tearin' each other up. Save 'em from havin' to solve the problem themselves, ya know?
'Course, that could backfire against them. Gangs are known to form within groups locked up like that, and they shore don't need a were-creatures' mafia.
Cosa Notturno.
i have no idea what theyre thinking... the whole thing gives me the creeps.
I can take care of myself.
They'll have all their fancy weapons, but even the government can't keep buying ammo made of silver! They'll go broke or ruin the economy or something.
But, yeah, ol' Zevon speaks the Truth!
We regret to see such irresponsible ravings printed as a "response" to our well reasoned and compassionate call for action. The ALPS community has nothing to fear from the citizens of this great country. It is a pity the citizens of this great country have much to fear from the ALPS community.
Well I think all of you alpos are sick! And I don't mean sick like with a virus sick. You all need to be put down. That's what you do with mad dogs and none of you are any better than mad dogs!
And no, I am not putting my name on this message. I don't want to get eaten by some crazy alpo!
That's very tolerant of you, Anonymous.
You damn chicken. I'll bet even our were-slug friend could make a dish of you. I hope someday you learn what it's like to be a social pariah. Actually, you probably already are. Sitting on your computer, leaving nasty comments.
You totally deserve to have your ribcage ripped open. I mean that in the nicest way possible.
Whoa Jim! Back off, buddy. Some people are just trolls. Don't let it get to you.
Hey, I've got an idea, maybe.....it's a little crazy, but, you never know. We need a lobby group. To lobby Congress to declare those suffering with ALPS as having an official disability. You know, so we would fall under the protection of the Americans with Disabilities Act.
Sorry I missed the meeting last night, I had to work.
That's not a bad idea, Lucrezia! I still think we need the big ALPS movie to really get things going, but I guess we can appeal to congress while we wait for Hollywood, the real power in the country, to get the project off the ground.
Fine then.
Why don't you come to our next meeting and state your views in person?
I'm sure we'd all enjoy having you.
I will run for president! The were-vote is more numerous than you think! Combined with sympathetic liberals, I can win! I mean, 'we' can win...
We must all band together. Join my campaign, and go canvassing. 'Convert' as many to our cause as you can. Go door to door with our message and turnout will be huge!
Incidentally, in order to raise money for my campaign, I am starting a business. I am marketing a new soft drink called "were-juice." It is good for the health of were-people and norms alike. Especially make sure the norms drink it.
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